The sun was starting to set on another hard day away from him.  She began to feel as though her clothing were working against her; as though they had taken on a life of their own and were DEMANDING to be set free.  She slipped out of her beautiful dress and high heels, tucking them neatly away.  As she looked out the window of her new apartment she smiled.  It was beautiful.  It was just what she wanted.  The colors, the flooring, the furniture.  And then her gaze turned to her bed.  THE bed.  The bed had been so lonely since she had been without him.  It, like her clothing had seemed to become her enemy.  She had laid in the bed night after night feeling like a stranger in a strange land and each morning when she would awaken, her gaze would immediately shift to “his” side of the bed and look.  And then her day would begin again with the knowledge that he was not there.  He would not be there to hold her.  She could not feel the soft touch of his hand on her skin.  She could not smell that smell…HIS smell.  She could not hear his heartbeat.  And once again she would be left trying to figure out how she was going to get through another day without him.

It was only a temporary split.  It was nothing permanent.  It was something that they had BOTH dreaded like the plague and were BOTH suffering through and yet something that they had mutually agreed to.  It had to be done.  It was SUPPOSED to be fun.  It was something that happened about once a year and they SHOULD be used to it by now.  And yet it seemed to get harder and harder each year.  She had stood at the airport and clung to him like a small child as the tears ran down her face and she had to fight the urge not to turn around and walk out of the airport.   But she had stayed.  As she felt she must…and their appointed time apart had begun.

Most of the time she had stayed occupied.  It was hard not to talk about him every waking moment.  It was hard not to spend all her time online with him, grasping at everything she could to give her the strength she needed to go on.  But most of the time she had managed well, until the sun went down and she was alone.  It was then that her time of grieving began.  At first she blamed it on jet lag, but soon she figured out that it really did not have much to do with time zones and countries.  It had to do with being away from him.  She could not now, and never had been able to sleep without him.  Without him the very best she could do was manage to fall asleep from exhaustion, only to wake with the dread that it would not be too long until she would have to do it again.  It was almost debilitating.

She felt the cold metal of her beautiful cross necklaces moving lightly between her breasts as she walked through the house admiring it once again and she forced herself over to the bed, gingerly sitting on the edge of it.  “He would like it” she thought.  It reminded her of something that he would find attractive.  She let her fingers trace the pattern on the bedspread letting the softness of it caress her mind.  She felt her body slowly tilting to the side as it begged her to give in…and then quietly she walked across the room and picked up the large red cushion that she had bought.

It was the one thing of color in the room.  She held it close to her.  Squeezing it tight against her naked body, closing her eyes.  And then she tossed it on the floor and lowered her body down upon it.  “It will never be right until I am in your arms again, V.  I will never be right until we are joined once again!”  She curled her body tight into a little ball and tried to “feel” him, but all that kept running through her head was “I miss you,V.  Four more days.  Hang on, baby…four more days and I will be home.”  

STYLING NOTES 

*Skin: Akeruka – Meg V2 Natural Mk1 with Meg V2 Lips5 Natural Tattoo
Lashes: –Ema’s Secret– Eyelash Snuggle
*Necklaces: Addiction – Precious Pearl Cross Necklace Long & Short
Nails: Adoness – Basic Nails – True Red
Hair: Clawtooth: Peek a boo – Coffee (Collabor88)
*Eyes: IKON – ‘Sunrise’ Eyes – Lagoon (L)
Apartment with furniture: [ba] – Fabienne pied-a-tierre skybox (Collabor88)
Color change Cushion with 10 poses: Glitterati – (Collabor88)