El Firecaster

Fire from Within

The Meaning of Sleep

Posted By on December 11, 2010 in All, Tracked Daily | 0 comments

It seems like years ago that you first took me on “The shores of night” and made me yours. I can remember the feeling of it all…SO new…SO wonderful…SOOO exciting. I really was clueless. I really had NO idea where it all would lead us…sometimes I wonder if you knew? You have always been so much more sure of things than I have been. Perhaps that is your nature? But not long after that you took me to Jenner and showed me everything that was yours…everything that was OURS now. Our new home, our new surroundings…Aerial…and I remember feeling like the little pauper that had woken up to find herself married to a great king and wondering how in the world it had happened?

There has seldom been a day since, that you have not surprised me in some way. I still keep feeling like I will wake up from the dream only to find that I am alone…and my life has returned to the way it was before I met you. But that is the whole point isn’t it? This dream is not one from which I will awaken. THIS is the dream I was meant to live…the boundaries between “real” and “unreal” forever blurred….insignificant. After having read “The Sandman” I think I understand a little better what it must be like to really LIVE in the Dreaming. It somehow makes things a little easier for me to understand….seems to make a little more sense of all we have seen and done…been…and continue to be.

I was still fairly young in SL. There was so much I did not know about groups and land and how it all worked. I knew that I had been in some groups…and that you were given a title when you joined one, but I had never stopped to think about how those titles were decided upon…who made them…who bestowed them. I first remember seeing “The Architects of Sleep” and thinking what an odd name it was for a group. Was it for people that liked to sleep a lot? Was it for people that tried to interpret dreams. Or was it just another fancy name for some poet/story writers group? I read the given description of the group…and had seen my friend wear the title, but still had no clue as to what it was really all about. I remember joining the group just so I could have rights to all the things on the property she inhabited…and I received the “traditional” group title. Little did I know that within a month I would be partnered to the group owner, be an officer of the group and have a new title…”The Sleep”. I remember how proud I felt when I first wore it. I had no idea what it really meant…but it was different from all the rest…it was special…it was mine and I loved it! (Images of Thor run thru my head!) And when TAOS was disbanded, I remember feeling the great loss of no longer being “The Sleep”. It was almost as if I had changed somehow. It was SO painful for me. It felt like part of ME was missing. And I did not know what to do to regain it!

And so…you can imagine the great pleasure I felt when once again…things were righted…and I could be “The Sleep”. But I am not sure, that until now…I understood what that really meant. What would it mean to be “the Sleep” of the “Architect of Sleep”? What would it mean to be “The sleep” of the one that made and created the Dreaming? Well, if I understand it correctly, sleep would be the vehicle that he would need to make all things work. Without it, everything would be for naught. There would be no need for his existence. Nothing would really matter. He and everything he had ever made would be worthless.

What would it mean to be “the sleep” of the great dreamweaver? It never talks of HIM sleeping. You often see him IN other peoples dreams, walking through their slumber. But I have to wonder…did HE sleep? I would like to think…that on occasion, he did. And of course, “The Sleep” would be of his own making, as was most everything else in his realm. Was it pleasurable? Would it bring him rest and comfort? It would have to be made to suit him perfectly. It would be different from any other sleep. It would provide him with all he needed to fulfill his responsibilities. Perhaps it was a little bit OF him…no matter what it was…or how different it was…it was perfect…for him.

What would it mean to be the sleep of the mighty Dream King? I can think of no greater, no more intimate relationship. I will forever be grateful for the title and hope that I can do it justice. I hope that I will FOREVER and ALWAYS be your “sleep” my dear prince. May I always be the love you sought and the peace of your sleep…

Immer…mein Liebster….D

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