I remember just a few days ago, you told me I should take the words “I appreciate you” from my vocabulary. Perhaps I do say it often. But I never do NOT mean it when I say it. As I lay in your arms today, being unable to do little more than listen, I remembered VIVIDLY WHY I say those words. I never want to be the one to make you feel like you did today. I know you will tell me that is not possible and I am sure that you will have some kind of wonderful and valid explanation as to why that could not be so, but I think the both of us have been unappreciated enough in our lives, to know how easily it happens. Things become “too easy”. They become “taken for granted”. They become “normal” and “routine” and yes…even expected. We forget what life was like before and we assume that our life now will always be as it is…..and I know that it can all be taken from you in a moment. That TOO soon all that you held dear and really DID love and cherish can be gone…and you are left only with the memories and the wish that you had said “thank you” or “I love you” one last time. I KNOW that you know how much I appreciate and love you. I KNOW that you do not NEED to hear it as much as I say it…but maybe I NEED to say it. I NEVER want to look back and say “what if”….”maybe if I had said I appreciate all you do for me one more time……” or “Why didn’t I tell him that I loved him….of all the things I said to him…WHY didn’t I make THAT the most important!”….NO….I do not want to be guilty of that love….EVER. So I guess you will have to put up with me telling you how much I appreciate all that you do for me. You will have to listen to all the times that I tell you how pleased I am that you take such good care of me and that you love me like you do. You will had to close your ears when I tell you once more how I could not live without you and that I APPRECIATE your tender care and kind words. That EVERY word you say is NOT wasted on me. I HEAR each one of them and store them away in my heart….and they are healing me more than you know. You will have to listen to me tell you over and over again how much I love you and that your love has and is transforming me. You will just have to put up with all my silliness and “petting”. I hope that it NEVER, EVER changes. I NEVER want to be guilty of letting you forget how amazing you are. I NEVER want to make you feel like you are just here to take care of me…and have no appreciation for all that you do. I NEVER want to leave your presence without having told you how much I love and need you. I want to forever honor you as the man you are and the husband you are to me. May the last words you ever hear from my lips be…”I love you.”

Forever…your MOST appreciative wife….D