It’s been over a year now, since I started “fashion blogging”.  It is amazing when you look back at all that can transpire in that short period of time.  I have loved it. . .for the most part.  There have been things that have happened that have made me pause and think.  Some of them caused blogging to no longer be fun for me.  I have once again come to that point and I have been asking myself “why???” for the last few weeks.

It is no secret that V and I have had some personal upheaval in our real lives and it cost me a couple of weeks of blogging, but since then, I have found it increasingly hard to blog.  I have a BUNCH of pictures on my HD that I have taken and never edited and/or published.  I have TONNNNNNNS more outfits that I WANT to put together in SL and share with you guys and yet. . .I don’t.  I continually find myself looking for a reason NOT to log in!!

The past few weeks have been weeks of introspection for me.  Vanish is OH so careful to make sure that he supports me and steers me in the right direction. (Thank you so much, love for your support and as always. . .your kind affections.)  I have been trying to look inside myself, asking questions, looking for answers. . .and surprisingly finding a few!  What does all this have to do with SL fashion?  Well. . .I THINK I have discovered the reason for my hesitancy!

When I very first started blogging, it was fun!  I had started blogging in response to the original 52 weeks of color challenge and it was exciting.  I had NO idea what I was doing,  but I was taking pictures and sharing stuff online and LOVING it.  I was learning about blogging/photo editing and as designers and fellow bloggers began to support and notice me, I CRAVED more.  I read other people’s blogs, watched photo editing tutorials and I played!

As time went on, I began to feel the constraints of trying to blog for the 52WOCC.  Even if designers decided to trust me with their creations, I STILL had to blog something within a certain color range.  And of course, the more I learned the more time I spent editing pictures.  It was not good enough just to take the pictures and post them any more. . .they had to be PERFECT!  Perfection=time.  LOTS of time.  It became a compulsion and I would spend HOURS editing things that never would have been seen once the pic was scaled down anyway.  But it mattered to me!  And so for hours I would sit in front of my computer and edit a set of pictures, which THEN had to have some kind of words to go along with them to comprise a post.  AND of course, styling notes to go along with it, which always seems to take a good chunk of time for me.

Vanish has quietly sat behind me and watched this, dutifully for the last several months now.  He would at times try to encourage me to only blog what I truly liked instead of spending SO much time on each tiny detail.  AND he would always remind me of how HE thought that my pics looked good just as they were and that all my hours and hours of editing were really not needed.  It was hard enough to concentrate for hours on a “good day”, but after my recent hospitalization, it was even harder. . .and less and less fun or rewarding.  Nothing was good enough.  Even after I had finished with a pic, I STILL felt like it needed more!  There was SOMETHING I should do to make it look better and I just needed to try harder.

After weeks of struggling with these issues and finding it hard just to get ONE post out a week, if even that much. . .I woke up one morning and it was really clear.  I had been unable to sleep and I got up to check my email notices, finding a notice of new hair that Alli and Ali had come out with and that had been given to me to model if I liked.  It was too late for me to get around to the modeling pics, (damn time zones) but the hair was SOOOOOO cute and I new right away what I wanted to pair it with a little dress from Vero Modero that I had wanted to blog for a couple of weeks.  The colors were SO vibrant!  It was mesh…and it came with a HUD to change the textures. . .so no need to CLOG up my inventory any further with the same design, just a different texture.  Each texture was SO nice and so cute that I would have wanted most of them anyway. . . :)) And once I put it on, I remembered the ADORABLE wedges that I had bought at Collabor88 from The Sea Hole for the June round.  (Collabora88 is quickly becoming one of my FAVORITE designer events to “attend” each month!!!  I have already looked at the creations featured for this period and am wondering if I need to take out a loan to buy all that I “need” from there.)  I had CUTE color change nails I had just picked up at The Perfect Wardrobe by Virtual/Insanity and the look just seem to come together SO easily.
I was SO proud of it when I was finished and as I sat there, watching the sun come up I felt kinda sad, because I knew that with ALL the pictures I still had to edit and all the things that were coming in DAILY that I NEEDED to cover, I was NEVER going to get this look blogged.  It would just set in my inventory and I would wear it to a few places, but I would NEVER take the pics of it or spend the hours that I needed to make it look a certain way, just to tell you how much I LOVED it.  And that is when it hit me.  NO ONE WAS MAKING ME DO ALL THAT EDITING! When I look at the pics that some bloggers and MOSTLY photographers put on flickr they MOVE me to want to be better and to DO that.  But it has ended up draining me and in my struggle for perfection I have taken something that was fun and easy and have made it hard.  (Yes, V. . .you are right).  And that is something that I want to change.  SO. . .for the time being, I am going to take pictures in SL and do some mild editing in preview and filter forge and post them!  Just as they are!  And share with all of you the things in SL the move me and make me love it…:))  ( OKOKOK. . .so I DID have to go into PS to do the combo pic, but that was ALL I did. . .PROMISE)

So here we go. . . and I hope to be seeing more of you. . .much more of you.  Until next time. . .MUAH.

STYLING NOTES 

Lashes:– DAMNED– Eyelashes
*Hair: Alli &Ali– Tia Hair
Jewelry:  Zibska– Ago ~ Earrings and Necklace in Golds
*Bangles:  Ear Candy ~ Miles of Gold Bangles R
Shoes:  The Sea Hole– Flossy Wedge- Pineapple
*Dress:  Vero Modero– Desire Exclusive (For Texture) M
Nails:  [VIRTUAL/INSANITY] SHORT NAILS- Hibiscus
Skin:  –Belleza– Lily Sk red Xmas gift
*Eyes:  Ikon– ‘Sunrise’ Eyes- Pale Hazel
*Poses: Purple poses
Location: The Returning, LEA 17